Maxine's Wisdoms

• My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.


• I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.


• Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.


• You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me


• Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.


• Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.


• Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.


• NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.


• The gene pool could use a little chlorine.


• Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.


• Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!


• Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.


• A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.


• He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.


• A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.


• The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.